Creepy Dancing Wierdo
May 30, 2006 | 1 CommentPosted by admin | Filed Under Erin Weed's Blog
In my classes, I often talk about how to deal with creepy weirdos you meet in life. These are the guys that skeeve you out, but you’re fairly certain he’s not going to throw you in a trunk or anything. They’re just weird and you just know you don’t want them within a 30 foot radius.
So it’s the worst when the creepy weirdos dance. This weekend I was at a live music club, and the band Jackson Observer was playing. (They rocked! Check ‘em out.) So I’m wathcing the band and doing the head-bob thing to the music, and this 5 foot tall guy, seemingly aged 40-45 and donning a fu man chu mustache, asked me if I wanted to dance. Ugh, no thanks.
Talk about not hearing “no.” (See post below from May 25) This guy came back 4 separate times, each attempt armed with another un-smooth line, and always wanting to dance. It was comical, actually. It was a odd situation though, because you never know if the guy is a friend’s dad or something, so whipping out the bitch act is usually the last resort.
So in this situation, I combined laughing while setting a boundary. It worked! Anytime someone is trying to convince you of something and won’t accept “no,” all you need to do is keep repeating your same answer. In this case, I just added a laugh and said, “No thanks…I’m good.” I said the same thing about 80 times. Eventually he gave up.
Maybe all this was brought on by the new tee I was wearing that said, “Shake your Buddah” with a little buddah man on it. Hmm…
Go Stephanie
May 28, 2006 | Leave a CommentPosted by admin | Filed Under Erin Weed's Blog
GA local hero receives a national award; and if anybody deserved one, 15-year-old Stephanie Quackenbush does. She is the Albany girl who fought off an armed attacker and then helped send him to prison. Today she received “The Courage” award. And courage is something Stephanie has plenty of. So much, she was honored at the Department of Justice National Missing Children’s Day awards ceremony.
Stephanie almost never lived to see her future. On June of last year, on the way to school she was attacked by a man armed with a butcher knife. Quackenbush fought and screamed, even after the man told her he was going to stab her. Her screams got the attention of two men, as her attacker ran. He turned out to be 24-year-old Darius Ashley, who is serving 25 years in prison for the assault on Quackenbush, and the rapes of two other girls. Stephanie’s mom, Rhonda Quackenbush, says she is, “proud, very proud. She has four sisters and she taught us all a lot. She deserves it.
Stephanie also has words of advice. “Just for like young girls, fight back, scream as hard as you can. You have one chance, why not take it.” Stephanie’s attacker also allegedly admitted to raping and killing Gretchen Perham, a classmate of Quackenbush. He has not been prosecuted for those crimes.
Won’t take NO
May 25, 2006 | Leave a CommentPosted by admin | Filed Under Erin Weed's Blog
In my book, I talk quite a bit about manipulative people. In most instances, before someone attempts to victimize you they will try to manipulate you in some way. It’s how they test your boundaries to see whether you’re going to be an easy target or a bad victim. One of the BIGGEST warning signs of manipulative people is their refusal to accept the word NO from someone. I notice that salespeople have this same tendency, and it really honks me off. I know they’re trying to make a living or whatever, but seriously, I hate that whole “never take no for an answer” sales approach.
So today I’m at the studio having a meeting with a business associate, when the phone rings. It’s a salesman, obviously well trained in not accepting “no.” Many women have a hard time using their voice as a boundary setting tool, but this interaction might give you a good idea how it’s done.
Sales Dude: Hi there, I’m Buck, and I’d like to talk to you about how your company can use promotional items like keychains to publicize your business.
Me: Thanks, but not interested. (At this point, you have the right to hang up. However, I wanted to blog about this, so I continued the interaction. Bloggers are nuts. We engage ourselves in unpleasant experiences, with the sole purpose being to write about it online.)
Sales Dude: Have you ever used promotional items before? (This is classic re-direction of conversation, as to ignore the orignial “no.” I’m onto it, and don’t fall for it.)
Me: I’m in a meeting and not interested. Thanks anyways.
Sales Dude: Let me tell you about some of our past satisfied clients…(I inturrupt him now.)
Me: Hey Buck, I already said no, and I’m not interested. Have you ever heard the expression “No is a sentence?”
Sales Dude: Well no, I haven’t.
Me: That’s because I invented it.
Sales Dude: Really? My boss wouldn’t like that.
Me: I bet he wouldn’t. I’m gonna tell you “no” one more time. Not interested. Got it?
Sales Dude: We’re actually having a 10% off sale that ends….(I hang up on him.)
Normally you’ll never “straighten out” a manipulative person, regardless of their mission. Just get rid of them as soon as possible. My apologies to all you phone salespeople out there who are just trying to make a living. But do me a favor and cut it off at 2 “no’s” alright?
Chicken Soup
May 19, 2006 | Leave a CommentPosted by admin | Filed Under Erin Weed's Blog
Yesterday I had the chance to meet an author and entrepreneur whom I really respect. Enter Mark Victor Hansen, co-author of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series. Mark is a great guy, and I had the chance to hang with him at an event during the Book Expo. I told him about my book that’s coming out, The College Girl’s Guide to Protecting Herself, and we talked about violence against women in today’s society. Then he asked if I talk about self-defense techniques in the book, and I explained I’ll be putting out a DVD late this summer which will cover the moves. (The can o’ whoop-ass chapter in the book mostly gives tips and theories behind the techniques.) In an unexpected turn in the conversation, Mark Victor Hansen then proceeded to grab my wrists and challenge me out of a wrist grab. Who woulda thought the Chicken Soup guy would be into that sort of thing! It was great meeting him. He’s a wonderful, inspirational person and I plan to use his model of putting out LOTS of books that help and inspire LOTS of people.
Assless Cat
May 18, 2006 | Leave a CommentPosted by admin | Filed Under Erin Weed's Blog
Yesterday I drove down to Washington D.C. for the National Book Expo. My good friend and fellow author, Eric Garland, lives nearby so I decided to stay with him for a few nights. When I got there, one of the first things I noticed is his mother-in-law’s cat named Razz. Eric and his wife are watching it while his wife’s mom travels, and I instantly knew something wasn’t quite right about the little furball. Then finally it hit me when he showed me his profile. He has no tail! That’s when I renamed Razz The Assless Cat. Eric doesn’t know if Razz was born this way, or was in some sort of terrible farm accident, but it’s pretty crazy either way.
Soroptimist
May 16, 2006 | Leave a CommentPosted by admin | Filed Under Erin Weed's Blog
Last night I spoke at the Wayne, NJ chapter of Soroptimist. It’s an international group of women who work to fundriase and create awareness to the struggles of women internationally. One of their big pushes right now is the issue of domestic violence, which is a worldwide cause for concern. Many of the women I spoke to yesterday were retired women who belonged to the group to keep giving back to their community. As a result, they weren’t so interested in this whole “Girls Fight Back” thing.
So I whipped out an idea that I’ve been wanting to test for awhile…”Seniors Fight Back!” Seriously, female senior citizens especially need to learn more about how to stay safe. Older women are often outliving their husbands, and may find themselves living alone for the first time after 50 years. They are also a bit more trusting, and are eager to help others. Sadly, this can sometimes lead to victimization in many forms. Just think about damage seniors can cause with a cane…SFB, coming soon.
M.I.T.
May 9, 2006 | 1 CommentPosted by admin | Filed Under Erin Weed's Blog
Last night I had the honor to hang, talk, learn and teach the students at Massachusetts Institute of Technology. (and who woulda thought I ever would teach these students anything! They are quite smart…) I was incredibly impressed with their dedication to ending campus violence, and getting rid of the silence that especially seems to envolop sexual assault. I gave the “How to Be A Bad Victim” program to both male and female students, and a raging good time was had by all. A big thanks to Jamie, Kaya and Scary Bad Guy Isaac for making it possible.
Hoboken Festival
May 7, 2006 | Leave a CommentPosted by admin | Filed Under Erin Weed's Blog
Today we really told the world the Girls Fight Back women’s self-defense studio had arrived in New Jersey. We had a tent/booth at the Hoboken Art & Music Festival, which draws thousands of people from all over the tri-state area. A bunch of my friends and GFB supporters volunteered throughout the day, and we gave away hundreds of brochures, flyers, postcards, buttons and stickers. Overall, it was a huge success…and I now know for certain that the general public is as psyched as I am to open the doors in June.
Thankfully, I have so many amazing people in my community that were willing to lend a hand today. At any given point, there were between 5 and 10 volunteers in the tent or handing out postcards, all wearing GFB t-shirts. It was like the GFB possee…I felt like P Diddy! A big thanks to you all! See photo above L-R: Colleen O’Brien, Erin Weed & Tiffany Loertscher.
I have given birth
May 5, 2006 | Leave a CommentPosted by admin | Filed Under Erin Weed's Blog
;)
Today my book was officially shipped off to the printer. Praise all that is holy, I am officially done. It took me about 2 and a half years, but I have officially given birth to what felt like an elephant. And now, I shall celebrate…hey barkeep! A margarita on the rocks please!
To all who have pre-ordered the book, nothing will give me greater joy than shipping them out to you in about a month. To those of you who have yet to buy it, it’s not too late! CLICK HERE to pre-order.
Go Teri
May 2, 2006 | Leave a CommentPosted by admin | Filed Under Erin Weed's Blog
I always thought Teri Hatcher was cool, especially in Superman. Then when she won a Golden Globe for her performance in Desperate Housewives, she really got my kudos. During her acceptance speech she referred to herself as a “former has-been.” Now that’s some refreshing realism and honesty from Hollywood…
So I thought she was a great actress, but I didn’t know until recently that she’s a heroine. Starting at the age of 5, Teri was molested by her uncle. The abuse continued for 3 years, and she never told anyone about it. Then in 2001, Teri was informed that her uncle was being charged for molesting a young girl named Sarah Van Cleemput. He became a suspect after Sarah committed suicide and implicated him in her goodbye note.
So Teri stepped up the the plate, called the District Attorney and gave a deposition. Within hours, her uncle changed his plea to guilty. He has since been sentenced to 14 years in prison.
You go girl.
Towson to Philly
May 1, 2006 | Leave a CommentPosted by admin | Filed Under Erin Weed's Blog
Thursday night I had the pleasure to speak at Towson University in Towson, MD. I spoke to about 300 female athletes who actually taught me a thing or two about whoop-ass!
Saturday I made the trek down to the Philadelphia area, where I spoke to about 20 lovely women at the United Sports Foundation. A big thanks to my scary bad guy Ray, and his mom Renee for setting up the event.