Weed Feed
Jul
7
Summer Solstice
Filed Under Girls Fight Back!, Peace & Happiness | 1 Comment
Well it’s July, and I couldn’t be happier about it. If you’ve been following my posts in June, you know it’s always a rough month for me. Every June I’m coming down after a crazy spring semester of speaking, plus it’s emotionally heavy being the death anniversary of Shannon, and also her birthday. But you gotta love the universe, because it gives you what you need to hear. Today I met a woman named Mia, who is a gorgeous, successful entrepreneur here in Denver. We were talking about my difficulties in June and she told me that June 21st was the summer solstice, and is apparently the longest day of the year and widely celebrated around the globe. It’s also Shannon’s birthday. I researched it on the internet, and many religions celebrate June 21st as the “wedding of Heaven and Earth” resulting in the present day belief of a “lucky” wedding in June. I find this so interesting, because Girls Fight Back has always been a merging of heaven and earth, and I’ve often referred to Shannon as my boss, crackin’ the whip from above…
I think it’s okay for us to sometimes just walk away for a bit, fall apart for awhile if need be, and come back stronger and smarter and more determined than ever to live an incredible life. That’s where I’m at today, and I have arrived here largely through gratitude. I’ve been thinking about the incredible people, opportunities and experiences I’ve been given in my life. My family, for starters…really, I couldn’t be more blessed on that front. To have people who have believed in me and propped me up, especially my husband Peter Lacis @peterlacis. In general, I marvel at the incredible men that have graced my 32 years on this earth. Health is our greatest gift as humans, and it’s something that my family and I have enjoyed. (I send strong vibes to many friends of mine who are dealing with health challenges right now, or who have lost a loved one.) And children! How grateful I am for my 10-month-old son Miles. He’s given me the gift of seeing the world through an entirely new set of eyes. Miles laughs insanely at my pug’s face sometimes. And then you look at the pug and realize, “My God, you’re right! She’s the funniest looking creature in the world!” And I laugh with him.
I am also so grateful for my team @girlsfightback. The past 12 months of growth and expansion have been the most terrifying and most inspiring times…sometimes I feel both in the same day. Recently I looked around and realized Girls Fight Back has become what it was intended…to be much bigger than Shannon and WAY bigger than me. We are celebrating this fact by launching a new website soon. And guess what? If you’ve never seen the Girls Fight Back program, soon you can watch it. For free. Online. All 100 minutes of it. Then hopefully you’ll send the link to all your friends. Some of my business comrades think I’m nuts to “give it away” but isn’t that why we are here? To help each other? Why withhold that? (I’m grateful to my friend David Meerman Scott @dmscott for inspiring this.) I hope watching the program online energizes someone to be strong when they feel weak, to stand up when they just want to shrink, or to change the world when it would be so much easier just to stick with the status quo.
My friends, life is good. We are here for a reason. You are loved.
Thank you for your support and may every day be your solstice.
Jun
21
Happy Birthday Shannon
Filed Under Girls Fight Back! | Leave a Comment
Every year, Sharon Rickerson (dear friend of the McNamara family) writes a beautiful piece on Shannon’s birthday. See below – it’s lovely, as always. Thanks for all you do Sharon, to make this day a little less bitter and more sweet.
Shannon Elizabeth McNamara
June 21, 1979 – Forever
Her name has an Irish wholesome, athletic sound. And she was like her name. Grand like the river that flows through the Emerald Isle. Natural, inspiring and beautiful! Shannon means Wise One, and she truly was. The Bible says wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. That was Shannon. She was a quiet leader, highly esteemed among her peers. Her life lived well enthused others and it still does today. It was her mother’s prayer when she left our world that she would never be forgotten. And that prayer was answered even before she was born. When Shannon was knit together in her mother’s womb God made an absolutely unforgettable person. Her loving heart, her beautiful face and the way her eyes sparkled when she laughed remain etched in our memories.
It was her exuberant love of life as well as her fight to live that inspired friend and sorority sister, Erin Weed in a mission to educate and empower women of all ages in personal safety and self-defense. We take great take comfort in knowing that Shannon’s untimely death was not in vain. Shannon’s fight was carried on by Erin who became the founder/CEO of Girls Fight Back (GFB). GFB seminars are attended by over 100,000 women annually in schools, colleges, corporations and women’s groups around the world. Shannon would be so humbled and grateful to Erin for pursuing such a noble cause in her honor. God alone knows all the ensuing good as He continues to bless Girls Fight Back, memorial scholarships and events established in her memory.
Shannon is as deeply loved and always remembered by her parents, her brother, her family and countless friends. And we cherish the memory of her heart felt love for us! Happy Birthday Shan!
The memory of the righteous will be a blessing. -Proverbs 10:7
Apr
5
Does self-defense work?
Filed Under Safety & Self-Defense | 2 Comments
Most people don’t ask me this question outright, but I know they are thinking it: Does self-defense really work?
That’s like asking the Sham-Wow guy if his towel really holds 12 times its weight in liquid, right? Hey, I welcome the believers and doubters alike, and I have more to offer you than my belief in the effectiveness of self-protection measures. But first, let’s figure out why it’s so hard to believe a woman can fight back and win.
I believe that doubt over the effectiveness of self-defense comes from a few places. First, many women feel insecure about their ability to fight back, simply because they have never received any training. This is why we need to make self-defense training more available to all women, and introduce it earlier in life. Second, bad advice like “fighting back will only make him mad” seems to permeate trickle-down wisdom through generations. This advice is not only inaccurate, but also dangerous.
The NIJ (National Institute of Justice) commissioned a study in 2005 called The Impact of Victim Self Protection on Rape Completion and Injury, authored by Gary Kleck and Jongyeon Tark. Click here to read the entire 77 page study, or just read the highlights below.
- Potential victims who resisted their attackers, either physically and verbally, decreased the odds of being raped.
- Fighting back does not mean a woman is more likely to be injured.
- Self-defense significantly reduces the chances of being raped.
- Certain self-defense techniques reduce the risk of rape more than 80 percent compared to doing nothing.
- According to victims, the most effective ways to fight back include: attacking or struggling against their attacker, running away, and verbally warning the attacker.
- If your idea of self-defense is stalling, cooperating or screaming from pain or fear – these approaches actually increase your risk of injury. So if you’re going to protect yourself, it’s gotta be forceful and strong!
Kinda makes you re-think just how dangerous you can be with even simple self-protection measures! If you’ve been putting off learning self-defense, don’t delay any longer. Click here to read about some of my favorite self-defense programs who offer classes in cities across the USA.
Mar
31
Phoebe Prince
Filed Under Random, Safety & Self-Defense | 4 Comments
I’ve been tracking the story of Phoebe Prince in the news, and am beyond saddened of her suicide. She was the focal point of brutal bullying and manipulation, and took her own life in response. Likely believing there was no other way out, her death was also her solution.
We owe our children better strategies to help them cope.
Don’t believe for a moment that Phoebe was the only girl in this country being ostracized and socially tortured. Countless young people endure this every day. The difference is, most kids don’t kill themselves. Which brings me to the question…
Why do people have to die before we respond to situations like these?
I’m encouraged by the 41 states that passed legislation addressing the problem of bullying in America. According to Stop Bullying Now, as of 2009 the 9 states listed below have not. Shame on them:
Alabama
District of Columbia
Hawaii
Massachusetts
Michigan
Mississippi
Montana
North Dakota
South Dakota
Wisconsin
Whether you’re an adult, a parent, a child or a teen – there are effective strategies to tackle this issue. If you’re a concerned adult, get educated. E-mail your state representative. Click here to learn more ideas of what adults can do.
If you are being bullied, please don’t take the same path as Phoebe. You are not alone. And there are people who will help you. Click here to learn what kids can do.
Jan
31
Stalking Awareness Month
Filed Under Random, Safety & Self-Defense | 5 Comments
January is Stalking Awareness Month, and a great website with tools, quizzes and resources is now available if this is something you are dealing with. I especially love their guidelines on how to create a Safety Plan. Visit the website by clicking here – and help spread the word too! http://stalkingawarenessmonth.org
Stalking is downright scary, and I know this on a very personal level. It can make a person feel powerless, cause acute anxiety and feel totally out of control. Please understand that each situation is different, and you need specific management of your individual case before deciding on any one course of action. Reach out for help, and don’t deal with this on your own. Here are 5 ideas to get you started…
#1: Acknowledge the situation for what it is. Might sound easy, but many people who are being stalked refuse to accept that the word STALK is appropriate. According to Safe Horizon, New York law defines stalking as a pattern of intentional, repeated, and unwanted behavior causing a person to fear for his/her own safety. A stalker can be anyone – a stranger, a relative or anywhere in between.
#2: Know the law. To find out the exact definition of stalking and possible ways to respond, know the laws in your state. Visit the Stalking Resource Center at The National Center for Victims of Crime website by clicking here.
#3: Read a book called “The Gift of Fear” by Gavin de Becker. By far, this is the best book I’ve read about intuition, de-escalating potentially violent scenarios and understanding the motives of people who pursue others inappropriately. Click here to buy it.
#4: Call the Stalking Hotline. Someone from Safe Horizon is available to speak with you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Call toll free: 866.689.HELP (4357). Check out their website by clicking here.
#5: Take a self-defense class. Hopefully the steps above prevent you from having to physically save yourself. However, the skills you learn in a good self-defense class are much bigger than learning to do an eye jab. Great classes will also teach you to recognize the signs of a violent person, how to use your intuition, ways to de-escalate bad situations and how to fight back if necessary. I especially recommend classes by IMPACT and FAST Defense.
I hope this helps…stay safe!
Jan
26
9th Annual Fundraiser in memory of Shannon McNamara
Filed Under Girls Fight Back!, Random | 1 Comment
The 9th Annual Girls Fight Back for Shannon Mac Fundraiser is officially announced, and we are very excited for it. This year all funds raised will be donated to a non-profit organization we are currently setting up called the Girls Fight Back Foundation. The Foundation is being created and run by our outstanding team of GFB Speakers: Jaime, Megan, Michaela and Heather. The focus of this organization will be to create a network of GFB Clubs at schools and colleges across the USA (and someday go global), which will promote women’s safety and self-defense education for young women. Here are the deets on the event:
What: Fundraiser for the Girls Fight Back Foundation
Host: Kate Lotz & Erin Weed
Start Time: Saturday, March 20 at 8:00pm
End Time: Saturday, March 20 at midnight
Where: Slugger’s (across from Wrigley Field)
3540 North Clark Street
Chicago, IL 60657
Cost: $30 which includes all well drinks, domestic beer, wine and soda
If you’re unable to attend, donations can be made to “Girls Fight Back Foundation” and mailed to:
Girls Fight Back!
4800 Baseline Rd.
Suite E104 #286
Boulder, CO 80303
We are seeking volunteers to help plan, promote & fundraise! Please email info@girlsfightback.com for details.
Nov
12
Denver Self-Defense Classes
Filed Under Girls Fight Back!, Random | 4 Comments
Girls Fight Back started in Hoboken, New Jersey in 2001 at a place called The Bar at 10th and Willow. Why a bar, you ask? Because the manager – a guy named Mario – had 7 sisters, believed in what I was doing and gave me the space for free. After getting certified by the American Women’s Self Defense Association as an instructor, I began holding weekend classes in the bar, and women all over the tri-state area attended. I remember banging on Mario’s apartment door at 10 am, so he’d let me into the bar to start class. (He went to bed at 6 am on weekends, so he probably cursed my name a lot those mornings…)
Today I’m excited to announce a new partnership with Denver’s coolest yoga hot spot, Spiral Yoga & Wellness. Starting November 21st, I will be teaching a 2-hour women’s self-defense workshop at Spiral once a month. (Normally the workshops will take place on the 2nd Saturday of each month – except for the first one in November, which is the 3rd Saturday.) Then in January 2010 I’ll start teaching an ongoing self-defense class every Wednesday night from 7 – 8:30 pm. (Whoop-Ass Wednesdays) These weekly classes are structured like yoga. Pay as you go, $15 per class, come every week or just once a month…no contracts, so you decide! (Note: You must attend one of our 2-hour workshops as a pre-requisite before starting weekly classes with me in January. This way, all students will begin the classes with an understanding of verbal self-defense, prevention strategies and other basic fundamentals. If you can’t make the Nov. 21 workshop, be sure to attend the one on December 12.)
Teaching again is very exciting for me. For the past few years I’ve been mostly speaking, writing and traveling. My average crowd size tends to be in the hundreds, sometimes even more than a thousand. But getting back to the basics, teaching a small group of spirited women and girls…well, I find this invigorating. I hope you’ll join me…please spread the word. Space is limited! Here are details for the first workshop:
Saturday, Nov. 21, 2009
2:00 – 4:00 pm
@ Spiral Yoga & Wellness
4106 Tejon Street
Denver, CO 80211
$20 per person (women/girls ages 12 and up)
Click here for details and registration
Sep
24
A Big Night
Filed Under Girls Fight Back!, Random | 4 Comments
Tonight I know that somewhere, an angel was smiling down upon us. In 3 different states (Ohio, Texas and Virginia) this evening, 3 of my speakers were giving Girls Fight Back seminars. These events took place at Old Dominion University, Baylor University and Ohio State. Wow. To think that a year ago, I was in the thick of my Fall Speaking Tour, living on airplanes and wondering how I could possibly find people to help me expand the company. I was exhausted, over-exposed and stressed. I lay awake many nights knowing I had to seek and train young women to help me conduct the presentations, but how? This seems to be the common thread in companies that grow. Each has a CEO that lays awake wondering how the hell it’s all gonna go down, trying their best to ward off nightly panic attacks…
For me, the fire was lit under my ass to begin this expansion after finding out I was pregnant. Not only did I want to expand our company, but at that point I absolutely had to! Full knowing I’d be out of commission while on maternity leave, the plans began for finding some incredible young women to carry the torch. That was November 2008, and by January 2009 we had speaker applications circulating on the web. They were due in April 2009, and then we had a whirlwind of interviews, video submissions, in-person meetings and finally the GFB Academy in June. That was probably the most inspiring week of my life, because with my own eyes I started to see what was possible.
And here we are today, just 3 months later. Fight Back Productions (the parent company of Girls Fight Back, since we now give seminars for other demographics besides young women) is rockin’ and the speakers are making me proud. Last year at this time, I was jet-setting around the nation, on stage in front of hundreds of people every night and blogging about my wild adventures. What a difference a year makes – Today I was excited to get out of the house and go to Walgreens by myself and get a flu shot. Ah, the joys of new motherhood…but I wouldn’t have it any other way. My life, our company, this mission…we’re all damn blessed.
Check out the Fight Back Blog to read about the events tonight…and maybe some pictures too!
Sep
23
Women’s Safety Manifesto – Part 1
Filed Under Random, Safety & Self-Defense | 3 Comments
According to Wikipedia, a manifesto is a public declaration of principles and intentions. I intend to do just that, as well as make suggestions on how to fix our damaged state of women’s safety education in the United States today.
My name is Erin Weed, and I’m the founder of Girls Fight Back and CEO of Fight Back Productions. We are a personal safety education company that teaches ordinary people they are capable of extraordinary things in the face of violence. I plunged unexpectedly into the anti-violence movement in the aftermath of my life’s greatest tragedy, the murder of Shannon McNamara, in 2001. For the past 8 years, I’ve been researching, training, writing, speaking, fighting and educating myself and others to become our own best protectors. While that may sound noble, I’m actually writing this manifesto because I’d like to apologize. Because we, the personal safety and self-defense community, have failed you.
- To every woman who ever walked down a city street and looked over her shoulder with fear, and had no action plan if someone was to emerge from the shadows…
- To every teen girl who experienced unwanted or forced sex because she didn’t understand the word “NO” is her right (and also a complete sentence)…
- To every man who has loved a survivor of violence, and awakens in the night to her crying softly, hoping he doesn’t hear…
- To the woman I saw on Oprah today who was the recipient of our country’s first ever face transplant because her husband blew off her face with a shotgun…
- To that woman’s daughter, who had to explain to Mom that falling back into the arms of the man who permanently disfigured and nearly killed her probably wasn’t such a good idea…
- To the women who will never bother to read this because violent things don’t happen in your neighborhood…
To all of you, I’m sorry on behalf of the movement. We don’t offer enough personal safety education, at an early enough age. I’m sorry no one ever taught you how to set boundaries as a pre-teen. There are still child safety ‘experts’ preaching concepts like stranger danger, despite the fact the most likely person to molest a child is someone they know. There aren’t enough reputable self-defense classes available, and virtually no network by which you can find the good ones. Or sometimes you find a great class, but are forced to choose between paying your rent or learning to fight that month. (Rent usually wins.) I apologize we haven’t integrated life saving self-defense education in schools yet, despite useful classes like algebra (sarcasm) being mandatory to graduate. Most self-defense instructors don’t market safety training in a way you can stomach, because we’re so hung up on visual martial arts symbolism like dragons and tigers. (Both of which can eat people, by the way - scary.) I’m sorry you aren’t validated more often that your intuition is correct, without needing to prove it. I wish you were told just how powerful you really are when basic physical techniques merge with an adrenaline dump, instead of being told you’re doing the step-by-step of a pinning situation escape incorrectly.
In Spring 2009 I conducted an anonymous, online survey asking everyday women of all ages, races and geographic locations about their personal safety and self-defense education. It was their responses that spawned this manifesto, after months of their honest and sometimes haunting answers marinating in my brain. I feel it is time to make some declarations about the state of female safety education in this country, or lack thereof. Because of the 136 women who filled out my survey, 64 responded YES to the following question:
Have you ever experienced any sort of crime or assault?
Did you do the math? That’s nearly HALF the respondents who said yes, admitting they have endured a violent act in their lifetime. And given that 86% of the respondents are under age 40, this is not a long lifetime we’re talking about. HALF. Actually, let’s assume it’s more than half since experts say many survivors cannot (or will not) label certain painful life experiences as the crimes they are. It just hurts too much. HALF. I’m sorry, but I can’t get out of my head that every party I’ve ever walked into, half the women sipping martinis in their little black dresses know this pain. Half of the 500,000 people I’ve spoken to in my seminars over the past 8 years understood the violence I spoke of all too well. Sometimes I could see it in their eyes, but many hide their suffering expertly.
So let’s hypothesize, based on my un-scientific survey, that half our female population has endured violence in some form or another. After the blood is gone and the wounds are physically healed, does it still leave a mark in other ways? According to the World Health Organization (2002), victims of sexual assault are:
- 3 times more likely to suffer from depression.
- 6 times more likely to suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder.
- 13 times more likely to abuse alcohol.
- 26 times more likely to abuse drugs.
- 4 times more likely to contemplate suicide.
These shocking statistics beg the question: What greatness have we missed out on from these women? What precious gems of contribution to our society have we been deprived of, all stemming from violence? I suppose we will never know. What I do know is more must be done to eradicate this culture of violence and victimization. Because seriously…HALF? Something is very broken here.
I will admit, there are days when I wish I was the CEO of a company more simple in nature. There’s a great soap store in Boulder that I covet to own, because it seems like a pretty carefree operation to run. What’s a tough decision for that store manager? Lavender or Patchouli? But then I think of this quotation by Hillary Rodham Clinton:
“I’ve often thought that when something is hard for you, whether it’s going to law school or anything else that challenges you, that’s probably what you should do.”
Women’s Safety Manifesto, Part 2 – Coming soon…
Aug
5
Fight Back Productions – New Video
Filed Under Girls Fight Back!, Random, Video | 2 Comments
Message from the August e-Newsletter…
The other night my husband and I went out for Thai food, and had a lovely dinner on the outdoor deck. The sun was setting on a very productive day, and I had gotten many things crossed off my to-do list. At the completion of the meal, our server brought us fortune cookies. And let me tell you – I love fortune cookies. Yes, they taste good, but I’m also a big believer in fate and subtle (or not so subtle) messages that are dropped in our laps. (Or in this case, show up in our food.) I always take my fortune cookie messages very seriously.
This night was no exception. Perhaps with everything going on right now, I built it up more than usual. With the busiest Fall Tour we’ve ever planned starting in September, and our first baby due next week, I am open to all the wisdom I can get. As I cracked the cookie in half with nervous trepidation, I hoped it would rock my world. And it said…
“About time I got out of that cookie.”
Really? A fortune cookie with a sense of humor? How fitting. And that’s when I knew this is the message I needed most. To relax, to live, to laugh…and to trust in the simple idea that everything is alright in good time.
Because things over here are better than alright…let me bring you up to speed on a few things. First off, in June I trained a team of incredible speakers who will be carrying out all presentations this Fall while I’m on maternity leave. You can meet them all by watching this brand new video on YouTube.
Second, you probably noticed we changed our official name to Fight Back Productions. This came about as customers began asking for educational programs for female employees (Women Fight Back) and for mixed gender audiences at colleges (Students Fight Back). It was time to develop a larger umbrella organization beyond Girls Fight Back that would be the home for all our educational programs. And so it was…
Third, we are currently planning our biggest and busiest Fall Tour to date. Please see the tour stops at right to see if we’re coming to a city near you. If your school, college or business would like to book a stop on the tour, we offer discounts if you book when our speakers are in your area. And if you work for a business that might be interested in becoming a tour sponsor, please contact us for an info packet.
So that’s the scoop! Until next time…I’m sending you simple joys and lots of good fortune.
Strong. Resilient. Spirited. Unified.
Jun
29
Now Hiring Interns
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Here ye, here ye…Fight Back Productions (Girls Fight Back) is looking for some fabulous interns around the nation! Specifically we’re seeking Events Interns in the states of: California, Colorado, Illinois, North Carolina, Oregon, Tennessee and Washington state.
Their main role is to organize and promote Girls Fight Back Second Saturday events. Second Saturdays are free, open to the public, women safety & self-defense seminars held in cities across the nation on every Second Saturday of each month starting in August 2009. Interns will directly assist our professional Speakers who conduct these seminars with a wide variety of tasks, and will also work closely with staff at our headquarters in Colorado.
The ideal Events Intern is mature, responsible, works independently, enjoys networking and has a go-getter mentality. He/She is willing to assist our Speakers in any way requested of them that pertain to all events. He/She believes in our mission, that all women have the right to defend themselves from violence in all forms…and that this education should be available to women regardless of age, race, religion or economic status.
Interns should be pursuing a college degree in the subject areas of: women’s studies, advocacy, business, non-profits, journalism, marketing, publicity, communications, advertising, fundraising, graphic design, web design or education. Other majors may also apply. Interns must receive college credit, and are not paid.
Responsibilities include, but are not limited to:
• Determining a suitable Sponsor (non profit organization) for each monthly event
• Secure a venue for Second Saturdays – gyms, auditoriums, libraries
• Web publicity via Facebook, MySpace, the GFB website, etc.
• Promote the event in the community via posters, flyers and networking events
• Serve as Assistant to Speaker before, during and after the event
• Assist in videotaping all events
• Facilitate donations, raffle, distributing literature and merchandise sales
• Be a friendly and welcoming face to all who attend the events
To apply, please e-mail your resume and a cover letter explaining your interest and qualifications to jobs@fightbackproductions.com. We are looking to fill these positions immediately. No phone calls please.
Jun
15
New Book Cover
Filed Under Girls Fight Back!, Random | 36 Comments
My book about college safety was first released as a self-published book in 2006. Since then, I’ve printed 2 more editions and last year the title was acquired by DK Publishing. This Fall, DK will be getting thousands of copies of the book into college classrooms to make safety on campus a top priority. A huge thanks to Mike Vaccaro at DK who is a true appreciator of girl power!
What is your favorite book cover design out of the 3 pictured above? (Click on the images to enlarge.)
Cast your vote by typing #1, #2 or #3 in the comments area.
May
26
Free GFB Seminar – June 6, 2009 in Estes Park!
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Estes Park welcomes Girls Fight Back to the public performance stage on Saturday June 6th! Come on out for a FREE, open to the public women’s safety and self-defense seminar. Our presentations combine cutting-edge safety tips, empowerment and a healthy dose of humor. We’ll help you see that fighting like a girl is a very good thing…then we’ll show you how! Learn more at http://girlsfightback.com. After the seminar, stick around for lunch, shopping, elk sightings and sunshine in gorgeous Estes Park, Colorado!
Click here to download an event flyer. Please post and spread the word! Here are the details…
FREE 90-minute GFB seminar!
Sat. June 6, 2009
11:00 am – 12:30 pm
@ the outdoor Performance Park Stage
417 W. Elkhorn Ave
Estes Park, CO 80517
Open to all ages!
FREE Admission!
FREE parking on-site!
FREE giveaways, live music and more!
This event is being sponsored by the Estes Valley Victim Advocates, and we encourage attendees to donate to this wonderful organization. *In the event of bad weather, the event will be moved to Estes Park High School. Please check out our Twitter page for any weather-related announcements the day of the event.
One last thing – EVVA is also looking for sponsors for this event. Is your business or family interested in backing this great day with a sponsorship of $25, $50 or $100? If so, please contact Annette at 970.577.9781.
Hope to see you there!
May
20
May E-Newsletter
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The Girls Fight Back e-Newsletter was sent today…view it online here, or just read the pasted message below.
Today I’m on the verge of a passing a mighty torch. At 7 months pregnant, my husband Peter and I are looking forward to meeting our little guy in August. That’s right – it’s a boy! I suppose God thought we already had too much girl power in this house. (And Peter probably agrees…)
This spring we hired 6 speakers to give the GFB seminar, and have booked 14 Fall events and 9 conferences. This is a new record! These new speakers will be attending the GFB Academy the first week of June. For almost a full week they will be studying the two things that scare most people into paralysis: Self-defense and public speaking. Brave souls!
Many people have asked me if I’m feeling sad in passing this torch, and the answer is a resounding “no.” Having six more speakers means we will reach six times as many people. Besides, for almost 8 years I have traveled the U.S. and spoke to over a half million women about how to become their own best protectors. No regrets! I published a book, produced a DVD, was named 2009 Best Female Performer by Campus Activites Magazine and have an incredible network on the web via our website, Facebook, Twitter and MySpace. Good work has been done, and I’m ready to lead the Mother Ship to her next big destination. I’d like to conclude with a story to summarize this point…
My final speaking engagement of the Spring ’09 Tour was an event sponsored by the Eastern Illinois University Alumni Association in Schaumburg. This was my farewell event until after the baby is born, and I was feeling a little uneasy at the thought of moving on. I wondered if this final seminar would bring some closure as I moved into a new role at Girls Fight Back…but I doubted it. Then someone’s face appeared in the audience, who was more special than words can say. It was Bobby McNamara.
For all these years since Bobby’s sister Shannon was murdered, he has not attended a Girls Fight Back seminar. It must have been too hard and too painful. He graduated high school the week before her murder, and endured so much loss at such a young age. His only sibling was taken too early, and Girls Fight Back must be a bittersweet reminder of that.
But there was Bobby, in the front row. I immediately knew this was a gift from Shannon. With the perfect timing only angels are capable of, she was telling me it was okay to move on, okay to train other people, that I had done my job and now it was time for a break and start a family of my own. In all my pregnant, hormonal glory, I fought back tears at the sight of him.
The seminar was great and the crowd was lovely. Afterwards Bobby approached me, and I was nervous. What if he didn’t like it, or was offended by something I said? But in an instant he put an end to all doubt. With tears in his eyes he simply said, “Thank you.” And then he hugged me. And it was done. Somehow, during the span of that sincere hug, I moved on to the next phase of my life. As Pete Seeger of The Byrds recorded in 1962:
To everything (turn, turn, turn)
There is a season (turn, turn, turn)
And a time for every purpose, under heaven
A time to be born, a time to die
A time to plant, a time to reap
A time to kill, a time to heal
A time to laugh, a time to weep.
So I will go forward, now with a team of people behind me, believing the final lyric of that song to be true…that there is a time for peace – I swear its not too late.
Strong. Resilient. Spirited. Unified.
To book a Girls Fight Back seminar, call 1-866-432-2423.
**Offering discounted prices for seminars booked in Washington state, Oregon, California, Colorado, Illinois, Tennessee and North Carolina. Contact us for more information.**
May
14
In the first week of June, I’m training 6 speakers to give the GFB seminars at schools, colleges and corporations across the country. They will be intensely trained that week in both self-defense, violence prevention education and public speaking. Their graduation is to give a live speaking engagement to an audience of women on June 6th, anytime in the morning or afternoon. These seminars must take place somewhere in Denver/Boulder, and ideally have a crowd of at least 20 people. These seminars are totally FREE! All we are asking for is feedback about the Speakers’ performance, and we’ll just need you to fill out a short evaluation form after the seminar is over.
We’re looking for venues and audiences to allow these speakers to strut their stuff. Know of any groups who would like this sort of thing? Any age females will work, as long as they are above 12 years old. Ideal groups may include: fitness groups, religious organizations, recent high school grads, girl scout troops, mom clubs, non-profits of any other group that can rally a bunch of women on a Saturday to open a can-o-whoop-ass.
Please call 1-866-432-2423 or e-mail us through this form if you have any leads. Thank you very much!
May
6
Thank you Sponsors
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Well the Spring ’09 Girls Fight Back Tour is officially over, and it was quite a wild ride. It usually takes me a week to settle back home, digest my travels and write about them. A full tour re-cap and photo gallery is coming soon, but for now I wanted to thank the 3 stellar tour sponsors.
STA Travel, the world’s largest student and youth travel agency, prides itself on getting student travelers the best prices. They are constantly working with partners around the globe to get students, teachers, & anyone under 26 the cheapest, most flexible flights and top rated accommodations. STA gave a $100 coupon off a summer vacation to anyone who attended a GFB seminar during this tour – how cool is that? An extra special thanks to Carly Mills, Patrick Evans and Olivia Wong who helped make this tour a huge success.
Alpha Phi International Fraternity is a membership organization dedicated to promoting sisterhood, cultivating leadership, encouraging intellectual curiosity and advocating service. Alpha Phi develops character for a lifetime. OK, that’s their mission statement from their website, but I can say from personal experience that it’s actually true. I first met Shannon McNamara in the chapter room of Alpha Phi at Eastern Illinois University, and both our fates were sealed as sisters more than friends. In the aftermath of her murder, Alpha Phi quickly supported my efforts to start Girls Fight Back and they haven’t stopped since. A special thanks to Arden Schuman & Denise Reens for keeping the belief that we’re all worth fighting for.
The Century Council was founded 1991 and funded by distillers. They are a national, independent, not-for-profit organization headquartered in Arlington, Virginia and are on a crusade to fight drunk driving and stop underage drinking. They were especially supportive of the Stayin’ Alive on Spring Break programs I gave this tour, since these are the weeks that binge drinking and accidents soar. An extra big thank you to Leah Patten for her belief that we can educate young people to make smart decisions about alcohol and safety.
Apr
22
Media Rant
Filed Under Media, Random, Safety & Self-Defense | 6 Comments
Let me start this post by saying I’m a former TV producer. Many of my close friends work in the media, and I see it as a necessary vehicle for having an informed public. But story headlines like this, when there is such a profound back-story, really honk me off: “Woman Jogger Attacked in Broad Daylight”
Click on the link above to read the whole story, and you’ll find facts that don’t quite match up to the scary headline. Let me summarize. A woman was jogging on a popular trail in Ogden, Utah and a man came out from the bushes. Here’s the exact account she gave to the dispatcher:
“I was running down this trail and he kind of stepped out. I’m not sure where he was and he said ‘Hi how are you doing?’ and then he tried to throw me down on the ground and I started screaming and kicking at him and then he got up and ran away, ran down the trail.”
The article proceeds to describe her attacker and recommend jogging in groups. The police hit the streets to inform women of the incident, scaring them to death and prompting females across Utah to start jogging with backpacks filled with self-defense tools like pepper spray and alarms. Then they interview a local self-defense expert who points out these terrified women are making a mistake, because the likelihood of them having time to properly use these weapons is not good if they have to reach into their backpack. He recommends women instead use a Sharpie-looking tool that’s actually a pointy weapon, or a small firearm. I don’t know about you, but I love a good workout accompanied by a few pounds of lethal metal in my pocket.
None of this sounds shocking to most people, because it’s the boilerplate violence against women article you read in the media every day. But can I just point out what REALLY happened here? She was attacked and fought back! Using her best three weapons (intuition, voice and body) she regulated this guy. And she won! Give this gal a freakin’ gold medal, or at least a well-deserved chocolate chip cookie.
Let me explain. First, the woman running trusted her intuition enough to sense this was a bad guy. It moved quickly, and this guy acted fast by throwing her to the ground. And here’s the clincher – she then starts screaming (verbal self-defense) and kicking (physical self-defense). His response to her dual resistance measures – He gets up and runs away! Holy shit, this woman was victorious! Yet the headline in the paper reads, “Woman Jogger Attacked in Broad Daylight.”
How incredibly sad. Why, why, why are we not celebrating this? I have a better headline: “Woman Jogger Kicks Local Rapist Ass.” Or, “Moron Rapist Runs Away After Local Woman Unleashes an Estrogen Whooping.” In my version of the story, the reporter shares details of her victorious encounter, and the woman speaks of the importance of sticking up for yourself and that all women should have the right to go for a jog by themselves. Below a big, smiling picture of our heroine the article concludes with event details of the upcoming town parade in her honor.
Which version of the story keeps women down, and which version inspires them? Which version keeps women afraid to sleep alone or travel the world or doing great things in life? And which version makes our young girls find new role models or sign up for a local self-defense course?
Mysterious ass-kicking woman in Utah, today I celebrate you. And I applaud anyone with stories like hers that are too successful, and therefore too unsensational, to be given the credit they deserve.
Apr
20
Columbine
Filed Under Media, Random, Safety & Self-Defense | 3 Comments
Last week my friend Ross Szabo sent me an email with excerpts from a USA Today story about the “real facts” behind the Columbine shootings. Ross is the Director of Youth Outreach for the National Mental Health Awareness Campaign, and he’s constantly battling the stigmas of people living with mental health issues. His paths and mine cross often, as many cases that involve violence are often blamed on some degree of mental illness. Sometimes it’s true, but sometimes it’s more because people can’t believe that normal, sane individuals are capable of violence. Same goes for an Oprah show I saw last week about Internet child predators. A young woman named Alicia was lured at the age of 13 by a child predator, and held her captive for days – torturing her. She described her captor as a “monster.” I remember classifying the man who killed Shannon McNamara the same way in the early days. But Oprah quickly pointed out that when we label these people as something other than human, we stop seeking to understand them, and how to avoid their violent tactics. I couldn’t agree more.
In case you’re curious, here are some bullet points of “truths” about Columbine, many of which are contradictory to what you may have heard in the news. It’s only when we understand the facts that we can truly learn. Read the entire article here.
*Neither were not goths or loners.
*They were not on antidepressants.
*They did not target jocks, African Americans or Christians.
*Further proving this point, Eric Harris’s shirt 10 years ago today read “Natural Selection”
*The girl who was shot after saying she believed in God? It’s not true.
*The attack was intended to be a bombing, and to shoot people as they fled. (Obviously, the bombs didn’t work.)
*They had a list of “people to kill” but most had graduated. In actuality, they wanted to kill everyone – even friends.
On the Today Show this morning there were numerous people featured who started speaking, educating or getting active to remember those who were killed. While it’s good to try and understand violence in hopes of preventing future nightmares, it’s also crucial to support those left behind. When Shannon was murdered, I overheard her mom say, “It’s my greatest fear that now Shannon will be forgotten.” I’m sure the same applies to the families of Columbine victims. So take today and remember – and try to learn for a better and safer tomorrow.
Apr
13
Ellen Snortland
Filed Under Girls Fight Back!, Random, Safety & Self-Defense | 1 Comment
A few days ago I was chatting with my friend Ellen Snortland on the phone. Ellen is a speaker, author, actress, on the Board for Impact Safety in California and one of the first women to write a book about women’s self-defense. She and I were discussing many things, but one thing that struck me was a story she shared about women suffragists. Ellen is quite the women’s history buff, and she told me that public speaking was one of the most effective tools the suffragists used to lobby for a woman’s right to vote. Specifically these speakers went on speaking tours, focusing on less populated cities in the Midwest to spread the message of their campaign. I’ve always found public speaking to be very effective in communicating with women across the U.S. and it reaffirmed my belief that more of us need to get out there, grab a mic and share our stories and knowledge with one another. After researching this, I found that Susan B. Anthony specifically was an incredible speaker and was the movement’s unofficial spokeswoman.
But back to Ellen – Since I became involved in women’s self-defense back in 2001 I’ve had a few permanent books on my desk. As Girls Fight Back evolves, I turn to these old faithfuls to ground me in what ideals this company was built upon. The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker is always a great reminder that each of us can (and should) trust our intuition when it comes to safety, relationships, life and business. The other book I always seem to turn to is Ellen’s book, Beauty Bites Beast. She recently returned from Brazil, where her book was just released in Portuguese! (See the YouTube video above, which is a film project based on Ellen’s book.)
People like Ellen, Eve Ensler and Lee Sinclair are so inspiring to me, because they are the leading the charge to make women’s safety education and self-defense a global issue. Yes, we have overwhelming problems with violence right here in our own back yards. But in countries where goats are more valuable than women, you can only imagine how much work we have ahead of us globally. Cheers for girl power everywhere!
Apr
8
NYC rape victim sues MTA
Filed Under Media, Random, Safety & Self-Defense | 5 Comments
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This morning I saw the story above on the Today Show, featuring a young rape survivor named Maria recounting her horrific story of being raped by a stranger in a New York City subway in 2005. She tells a harrowing narrative of finding herself alone on a subway train at 2am and her intuition sending her serious dangers signals. After missing her stop, she gets off at the next one and the man follows her. She breaks into a run up the steps towards the exit, and he pulls her backwards down the stairwell. He rapes her at the bottom of the stairs.
But she wasn’t alone in the Subway station that night. As she ran up the steps to escape, there was an MTA attendant on duty and he locked eyes with her. He saw what was happening and called the authorities. He did not leave his booth and did not intervene beyond calling the emergency hotline for the MTA. Should he have done more?
Maria sued the MTA, claiming she blames the employee more than her rapist. She says the perpetrator had mental problems with no sense of reality and had no conscience, but the MTA worker did. She states she wasn’t expecting a physical intervention, but at least to yell over the intercom or do something more than hitting an emergency button. Is that too unreasonable to ask? In general, this begs the question, who was responsible for Maria’s safety that night?
Herein lies the great debate within the violence prevention community. Some say we should only be educating violent people to stop committing crimes – “We shouldn’t have to deal with violence or learn to protect ourselves in the first place – men should simply not attack women!” they say. Some are victim blamers – “What right did she have to be on a Subway at 2am by herself? And why didn’t she fight back?”, they marvel. Some agree with Maria and blame the bystander – “Why the hell didn’t he do more?”
I think this is the problem with violence prevention in America – there are so many different stances that oversimplify the issue. Men or women or good guys or bad guys alone will not end violence. It’s got to be a community effort. We must be responsible for ourselves, and be willing to take action on behalf of another – regardless if they are friend, foe or total stranger. Our education needs to reflect this, the younger the better in my opinion.
What do you think? Who is to blame, and should Maria win the lawsuit when she appeals?
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